Who’s in Charge of this Church Anyway?

One leadership evolutionary path of the home church

Home churches are a different kind of animal in the way they make decisions. From the outside they often appear to look like chickens with their heads cut off. We appear to run around with no direction sometimes. From the inside something very different is at work.

Christ is the head of the church.

The Bible is clear about leadership in the Church. Children are subject to their parents. Wives are subject to their husbands in partnership. And CHRIST is the head of the Church. This we understand intellectually but in practice it is a journey toward realization.

Most of us have grown up in a traditional top down leadership structure in our churches. In addition almost every leadership structure we have ever encountered has been the same. There has always been a boss or a pastor or coach or parent that has told us what to do. Even if we were the boss or pastor we still participated in this leadership structure as the person in charge.

Believe it or not Church and God are no different. There is still someone “in charge.” It just not who we think it is. Jesus is in charge by way of the Holy Spirit. Christ is the head of the church. So where does that leave the rest of us?

Recently we have made a practice of calling our “church” our “church family.” “Home church” is simply a misnomer that is useful for explaining what we do, to our institutionalized brothers and sisters. Church family is a more accurate way of describing who we are and how we behave. In this family, there is a father figure, God and a mother figure, the Holy Spirit. Jesus is whom they have left in charge. I know doctrinally God is one. But you recognize that our one God chooses to interact with us in different ways. I am trying to capture the flavor of that here. In any case the point is we are all brothers and sisters in the Lord.

Is one brother the lord over another? Can I command my younger siblings to obey me just because I am older? I cannot do that in the World how much less should I do that in Church? Does the hand tell the leg what to do? The head, Jesus Christ, tells the rest of the body what to do by way of the nervous system, the Holy Spirit.

Even all this we know in our heads. But it has not always reached our heart. And beyond that putting these ideas into action is against everything we have ever been taught or experienced.

What I’ve seen in the past is we go through a transition period. Usually a home Church is started by a charismatic person with some training in the church. They may feel something is wrong in the current situation or perhaps they just feel God’s calling to do something different. That person is usually “in charge.” He makes most of the decisions and feels personally responsible for the success or failure of every meeting.

As trust grows, some of the decisions are allowed to be made by some of the other members of the group. The person in charge delegates that authority to a few of the people he or she trusts for whatever reason. This is still a top down authority structure that begins to look like brothers and sisters acting as peers if you are in the “in” crowd.

Later on when the initial leadership team begins to become more comfortable with themselves and God’s leading, at least intellectually everyone is brought into that group of leadership. At first is looks like the leaders are weighing the input of the other people in the group. But after awhile the “leaders” begin to simply allow others to make decisions about various aspects of what’s going on.

This is when a significant change in group dynamics can occur. Prior to the leaders giving away control the group belonged to the leader or leaders. They owned it, will it, had the right and power to kill it. I remember in one church plant Tara and I were involved in, the couple who were the charismatic couple that got things started, decided to leave. We had already been working through the leadership issues for quit a while. But they still thought when they left the group would just shut down. They brought a scrap book for everyone to sign and it was very emotional for them. They were very surprised to learn that we kept on going after they left. That group didn’t last forever. But it closed for different reasons then someone in leadership leaving.

When the leaders give up ownership of the group, the followers can take up ownership. Two things I have observed during this paradigm shift of behavior and thinking. First followers begin to be self directed (or perhaps Christ directed.) And the group takes on a significantly new flavor. Individual creativity is allowed to flourish. The other thing is the leader types take a break. A needed and well deserved break I might add. Since the groups survival no longer depends on them to make things happen and they are not in charge for the most part, they tend to relax. This a wonderful benefit by the way for the would be pastor and his family. They are now allowed to be human, to have faults and to receive care from the other members without shattering their superhero image.

At this point some people may begin to exert their new found freedom in exercising their faith in the group. But both the leaders and the followers will naturally fall into old patterns of command and control and being commanded and controlled. Perhaps command and control is a bit to strong but we have all seen situations where those words fit the bill.

The last phase I’ve seen is where the leaders systematically remove themselves from leadership. At the same time the encourage others to step up to the plate. I remember a conversation I had with my wife where she was “unhappy” with the way things were going in our home church years ago. We spoke about it and I encouraged her to be responsible for making the change that she wanted. Another time a woman in the church was unhappy with our lack of worship. There were no guitar players in our group of musically challenged. If she wanted something different it was up to her to make it happen. Not that she can’t ask for help or bring it before the group. Only that it was her responsibility to be in charge with whatever God was leading her in.

The last phase I’ve seen is when the leadership deliberately remove themselves from the lime light. They ask question like “what do you think?” or “what does the Bible say about that?” It becomes a situation where not only control is given up but the torch is actively passed to everyone else. Actively being the operative word. They repeat over and over again that it’s up to everyone to make the group work. And they mean it.

Anyway that’s what I’ve seen. But who knows maybe the pendulum will swing the other way in a few years and I’ll be a senior head pastor of some religious country club that charges an extraordinary but sliding scale of dues. Probably not.

Peace,

-JH